1 What Happened to You?: Conversations on Trauma, Resilience, and Healing – by Oprah Winfrey
If you’re going to read this book and you’ve had any form of trauma in your life I just recommend a lot of self-care and love and welcoming as you read it because it can be activating so another thing that’s really standing out in this book is how high functioning people have all these little micro nuanced ways in which they can disassociate and just keep functioning. Dr. Perry talks about how disassociating or checking out is a form of regulating the nervous system but what stood out was all the ways in which he listed that it shows up daydreaming getting confused defaulting into a people-pleasing state numbing out or brushing off their feelings another way is by having a delayed reaction and not even realizing it impacted them until days later sometimes not even at all sometimes someone has to point out that they seem off the book was also emphasizing the importance of having more trauma-informed people around so people can recognize these signs instead of invalidating or dismissing. – Cat
2 Existential Kink: Unmask Your Shadow and Embrace Your Power – by Carolyn Elliott PhD
Each of us has a dual nature: we are light (conscious) and dark (unconscious). The dark side of our personality—the “other,” the shadow side—is made up of what we think is our primitive, primal, negative impulses—our “existential kink.” Our existential kink also drives the dark or negative repeating patterns in our life: always choosing the abusive partner or boss, settling for less, thinking that we’re undeserving, not worthy. But it also is the source of our greatest power.